By Walt Barron: A close, personal friend to Rocky Top Insider, Barron is a lifelong Vol fan who will travel when he can but mostly cheers for the Big Orange from his home in Durham, NC.
If you haven’t seen the video of Tennessee coach Josh Heupel talking to his players in the locker room right after the big win at Oklahoma, please take two minutes and watch it now.
Had a little something extra. pic.twitter.com/5R09sSlFb9
— Tennessee Football (@Vol_Football) September 22, 2024
I’ve seen it at least 10 times already. And it gets me each time.
But surely we saw this coming, right?
We knew the significance of this game. Not only was it a top-15 matchup that attracted loads of media coverage, including ESPN GameDay. But it also was Heupel’s homecoming. The return to his alma mater. The place where he was a star quarterback and Heisman finalist who led the Sooners to a National Championship in 2000.
It also was his first time back since being fired as offensive coordinator just a decade ago.
As if all that weren’t enough, don’t forget that Heupel’s mother, Cindy, died less than four months ago. I can only imagine how much he relied on her during his time at Oklahoma. All the postgame hugs she must have given him on that very football field. And the support she must have provided him when he was fired. Being in that stadium must have conjured up so many memories of her.
Amid all the emotions of homecoming, he also was grieving her loss.
I knew all of this. I was in Oklahoma Memorial Stadium when they welcomed Heupel back and put him on the jumbotron. I talked to OU fans and heard how adored he still is, even by those who approved of his firing.
And yet I was still caught off guard watching this postgame video. I expect this kind of emotion from someone like Tony Vitello, who’s about as open and extroverted as it gets. But not Heupel. He’s stoic. Introverted. He keeps things close to the vest.
This is one of the few times he’s let his guard down. And in doing so, he gave us all a masterclass in how to be a role model.
My role model taught me a similar lesson.
Our family moved to Knoxville in 1981 when my Dad became the Senior Minister at Sequoyah Hills Presbyterian Church. He led and counseled with poise, wisdom and selflessness. He projected calmness and always seemed to stay strong and calm while helping others face life’s challenges and tragedies.
But the strongest I’ve ever seen him was in a moment of weakness.
My wife and I had just experienced the sudden loss of twin baby girls when she was 21 weeks pregnant. At a small memorial ceremony, Dad broke down. Tears flowed. He was devastated. He was grieving. For us.
Dad died this Father’s Day, but this memory will always stay with me. By being vulnerable, he showed how deeply he loved me. And it made me love him even more.
I can’t help but believe Coach Heupel’s players felt the same way about him as he gave his postgame speech.
Heupel tried to downplay the significance all week leading up to the game. He deflected questions and kept saying that this game wasn’t about him – it was about the team. He stayed true to his word even after the win, shifting attention toward the players by thanking them for giving a little extra for him. Then he told them he loved them. But they already knew.
Like every coach in every sport, Heupel was hired to win. But I’ve always believed coaches are also teachers. They teach young athletes how to grow and develop and become the best versions of themselves.
His classroom this week was that locker room in Norman. And the lesson was that not only is it okay for leaders to cry, but it’s also natural. It’s healthy. It strengthens bonds. Because leaders too sometimes need to lean on others.
It’s clear the players aced the pop quiz when they flipped the script and gave the head coach the game ball. What a moment.
Most of us weren’t in that locker room, but we still got to audit the class. We even get a front-row seat.
So feel free to watch it again. Just make sure the tissues are nearby this time.
